Dear 15 Year Old Jesse,

This is your future best friend writing to you…from the future. (I know you think that’s cool!) Turn down the Spice Girls and pay attention. I’m not writing you to share about things that occur in the next few years because they don’t involve me.One day you’ll learn I can be a bit selfish and this will make sense. Because I love you a lot and our beginning was full of turmoil…I want to make sure we meet and everything works out.

So…one night, during a drinking binge, you will drag yourself to a party on the other side of the park. Inside you’re probably feeling a bit insecure but outwardly you just appear shitfaced. So don’t be shy. You will be mingling with said party goers when a young lady, inappropriately dressed for both location and life in general, will burst into the gathering. Saying you’ll be intrigued by her brash behavior is an understatement. Working up the balls to approach her amidst the group she is engaging will be difficult but one of the smartest moves you ever make. This is fact young and confused Jesse.

Here is a brief of how the first interaction between us will go- You speak, I mock. I speak, you act like a defensive dick. I’m a total bitch towards you the rest of the visit. You will become increasingly defensive and I will become increasingly mocking. (Later, we will both get over these behaviors. Well, not really.) When I leave, you give me a hug and say we should hang out. Which seems weird to me since all we did was fight. You don’t know this but when I go back to my party, all of the girls will talk about our supposed chemistry and I will I tell them how obvious it is we’ll never be together romantically. As always…I’m right. I knew all of your secrets immediately.

A few days later at the deli where you work (don’t worry you get way better jobs soon) you see me across the shop and start yelling to get my attention. I will make this uncomfortable for everyone when I basically ignore you. You won’t be deterred though and will scrawl your number onto a huge sandwich wrapper to be passed to me as I leave. This will impress me but naturally I’ll pretend it doesn’t. I still don’t call you.

In fact…I’m not sure how we went from all that to what we have now. Which is truly EPIC by the way. I know you agree because you tell me how fabulous it is all the time. When we remember how this all began we laugh our asses off. Which is why we get along so well. We are almost always laughing. Laughing our WP’s off. Or fighting, and that’s fun too. Which is why its important that everything falls into place just so.

This probably all appears very dysfunctional to you in your youth. But it works for us I promise.

From what I understand you’re kind of weird right now. So just know that when you are a struggling 23 year old…you’ll meet me. And while everything doesn’t magically become better on paper…your life is super enhanced. Your welcome. For everything I do in the future and for taking the time to send you (a whippersnapper) this letter of encouragement.


Your future BFF


PS: Don’t dye your hair black when its long. Ew.


2 thoughts on “Dear 15 Year Old Jesse,

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